Even when I’m not horny I’m still pretty horny
does your signature just like happen to you once you adult
So fun fact, one time when I was in the hospital I was on the same floor as a judge. I asked him what people who can’t write sign for their signature, and he told me that it doesn’t matter what you write what matters is the intent that you are consenting to what you are signing. You could draw a little picture of a dick and it would still be a legal signature
girl scouts are letting in trans* girls and letting girls replace God with whatever they want in the pledge, also they use cookie income to support abortion and LGBT agendas
boy scouts are just now allowing gays in, officially in january, but gay leaders are still banned and they’re talking about segregation on camping trips, with gays and straights in different tents. also they still ban atheists,
girl scouts: 10000 boy scouts: 0
today a kid in my Drama class got detention but he pulled a Monopoly get Out Of Jail free card out of his wallet and my teacher let him out of it
how do you get detention in drama
long story short he kicked the ceiling by accident
how do you kick a ceiling
- I left my favorite pair of underwear at your house. I know your mother hates me, can I come pick them up?
- It’s been almost a month and I still miss you like a fucking limb.
- I didn’t know my bones could ache until I met you.
- You know, a week before we broke up, do you remember? I had bought a book of poetry. You asked why I didn’t read something more interesting and I could feel my insides splinter.
- You said poetry was all lies dressed up to sound pretty. When I look at you these days, I want to ask if sadness sounds pretty to you too.
- It’s 3 a.m. and this alcohol tastes like you.
- I saw you staring at me today during Lit class. I smiled at you and you didn’t smile back. I almost cried.
- The girl who sits next to me smells like you.
- I miss you.
- I have never had so many bad nights.
- Sometimes I write poetry about you on the internet. Strangers who have never met either of us think you’re cruel – they tell me if they had the honor of loving me, we’d have sex three times a day and they’d scream my name when they came.
- They think it is beautiful, how I am broken. I don’t think they understand.
- You used to tell me I was beautiful. I tried saying it in the mirror the other day, but it sounded wrong without your mouth wrapped around it.
- Everything I say sounds wrong without your mouth wrapped around it.
- We were never in love, but, oh God, we could have been.
- Friend: go ask
- Me: no you go ask
- Friend: no you
- Me: fine can i have ketchup